CHILDREN

A lady lost her handbag in the bustle of Christmas shopping. It was found by an honest little boy and returned to her. Looking in her purse, she commented, "That's funny. When I lost my bag there was a $10 bill in it. Now there are ten $1 bills." The boy quickly replied, "That's right, lady The last time I found a lady's purse, she didn't have any change for a reward."

COLLEGE

It was graduation day and Mom was trying to take a picture of their son in a cap and gown, posed with his father. "Let's try to make this look natural "she said. "Junior, put your arm around your dad's shoulder." The father answered, "If you want it to look natural, why not have him put his hand in my pocket?"

PULL SOME WIRES

Rejected by the college of his choice, the banker's son angrily accosted his father. "If you really cared for me, you'd have pulled some wires!" "I know," replied the parent sadly. "The TV, the Stereo, and the Telephone would have done for a start."

A MOTHER'S LETTER TO HER SON IN COLLEGE

Dear Son:
Just a few lines to let you know that I am still alive. I'm writing this letter slowly because I know that you cannot read very fast. You won't know the house when you come home...we've moved. About your father he has a lovely job. He has 500 men under him. He is cutting the grass at the cemetery. There was a washing machine in the new house when we moved in but it isn't working too good. Last week I put fourteen shirts into it, pulled the chain, and I haven't seen the shirts since. Your sister Mary had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether it is a boy or girl, so I don't know whether you are an aunt or uncle.. It rained only twice last week; first for three days, and then for four days. Monday it was so windy that one of the chickens laid the same egg four times. We had a letter yesterday from the undertaker, He said if the last installment isn't paid on your grandmother within seven days, " up she comes."
Your Loving Mother

P.S. I was going to send you $50.00 but I had already sealed the envelope.